Xi Jinping arrived in Russia today on his first trip abroad as China’s president. While the agenda for the meeting will no doubt be brisk, Xi and Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin are widely expected to chew the fat on one of the countries’ most pressing issues: Namely, who has more right to hack the US. Russia’s major interest in hacking the US is in infecting its PCs and creating an army of bots that may one day storm the international banking mainframe. China on the other hand has dibs on any valuable intellectual property and trade secrets.
It’s uncertain whether these interests will overlap during Xi’s next 10 years in office, or Putin’s next 30 years in and out of the Kremlin. However, CHINA ECONOMIC REVIEW suggests China not give up its hacking efforts to get Du Pont’s secret paint formula, because the lead-based stuff on the walls of our apartments is giving us nose bleeds.
Sources said Xi and the Russian strongman were scheduled for a shirtless fly fishing trip on horseback. During the ride, they’re expected to broach several sensitive topics, including a longstanding borders dispute over a 1.5 million square-kilometer plot of land often referred to as Mongolia.
Less important was a rumored deal between a major Russian company and China for up to 1 million barrels a day of a thus far unidentified liquid of high viscosity. Based on the description, CER believes the liquid to be Borscht, a popular Russian soup made with beetroot, beef shank, carrots, fresh dill and often served with a lump of sour cream on the top. Some recipes include butternut squash, insiders said.
Of even lesser importance was Xi’s meeting this week with US Treasury Secretary Jack Lew. The two reportedly discussed hacking, the crisis in Cyprus, as well as how to hack Cyprus. It was rumored that Xi only met with Lew because he thought his name sounded Cantonese.